Holiday. Celebrate. I live in my sister's basement.

It's the first day of July. Where did June go? I suppose summer loses some of it's magic when you become a grown-up and summer vacation ceases to exist, but I still marvel at how quickly time passes. It makes me feel old and I don't like feeling old.

I'm officially IV certified, so if anyone needs some maintenance fluid or IV piggy back antibiotics, don't hesitate to call. I successfully got both my sticks on the first try without any "fishing." I was very pleased....and so was Alivia....nobody wants to be a human pin cushion!

We have big plans for this holiday weekend! BBQs and trips to Bear Lake and water balloon fights. I will not be participating in the aforementioned water balloon fight, as I don't like wet underpants, but I'll fully endorse my children spraying their father with the hose!

Have a safe and fun Fourth of July Holiday everybody!! And just remember: "These Colors Don't Run"!!!

Just a little poke...

I'm doing IV therapy this week. After just four days I will be proficient in the art of starting IVs, calculating IV medications (which are, hands down, one of my most favorite things to do in the world....gtts/min and solving for x make me happy), and removing blood for testing. This is all very exciting. Except the fact that I've never actually put an IV in before, let alone gone anywhere near a human being with a needle. So before they let us "stick" our partner, we have to practice on mannequin arms (see above picture), complete with fake blood, that squirts back at you if you don't put the T-tube in fast enough! I performed my first successful angio-cath on a very accommodating mannequin arm today and am feeling a little more confident with my skills. My partner, Alivia, may not like me too much tomorrow, but I'm going to focus on not making her look like she's a IV drug abusing transient.

On a happier note, I haven't officially welcomed Baby Avery to the world yet.....so.....Welcome Baby Avery!! Yeah. That was anticlimactic. When you come to visit Auntie Amanda in a few years, I'll teach you some valuable lessons about not going to sleep with wet hair or wet fingernails and also how to avoid romantically pining after a gay man for 3 years....very valuable lessons indeed.

On a sadder note, I'm sorry about the job, Briskey. Keep your head up. Just keep swimming. Like a kitten in a tree, hang in there. You can always move back here and live in my basement. But you'll have to earn your keep by waking me up every morning by screaming "Fat ass, Fat ass" and then pantomiming Maggi smoking. The pay is excellent and I'll see if I can get you dental.

IIIIIIIIIIIII'mmmmmm Baaaaaaaack!

Hello, my dear friends, it has been ever so long since I've been here with you. I apologize for my long absence. I have been very busy these last few months, allow me to elaborate....

1. I applied for the LPN program
2. I met an unbelievably cool man
3. I got accepted into the LPN program
4. I married that unbelievably cool man
5. My entire life became homework, clinicals, tests, homework, studying, and more homework

But now, dear friends, I finished my last final (Care of the Family, if you'd like to know) this morning at 10:30am and, with the exception of a few odds and ends to finish up (exit interview, field trip to the burn unit at the U of U hospital), I am officially finished with my LPN program and will graduate next Thursday night. Do you know what this means?! No homework! AND I can share my insanely boring life with you all on a regular basis...aren't you excited? You should be!!

A few things:

1. Briskey--Ashley needs to stop kissing all of those men. As a healthcare provider, she's increasing her risk for contracting infectious mononucleosis or herpes simplex virus 1! A little self control never hurt anyone, Ms. Bachelorette, play a little hard to get, geez...

2. Ann-ette--I'm hoping that option 1 is the suggestion I made for you the other day....awww yeeeaaahhh....

3. Lil--Your baby makes my uterus hurt. His 'No Look' is so unbearably cute, it almost melts my icy cold heart...almost...

4. Kevin--I'm glad that you're moving onward and upward...I'm sorry you didn't get the position, but as cliched as it sounds, everything happens for a reason and something fantastic is coming your way, I can just tell. Also, can I come to the Mile High city to visit and buy you some chocolate munchkins from Dunkin' Donuts?!

Ok. Well. I'm going to go. My brain is a little fried post-finals and I'm in need of reruns on Bravo! Peace out!

This post is Amanda approved!

I'm writing to you from the warm comfort of my bed (God bless the laptop) whilst wearing the sock monkey pajamas Hans bought me for Christmas this year...they're full of win and exceptionally warm. Annette, it's not snowing here, but it's doing that poser raindrop kind of thing that it really wants to be snow, but can't quite get there. I do not approve. I'm ready for real Spring weather, although I'm convinced we're going to have one day of lovely Spring and then it'll be 900 degrees, because Mother Nature is a cruel bitch who likes to mess with me.

I'd like you all to know that I took my physiology final yesterday and am now finished with all my prerequisite classes. I won't know how I did on the final until next week, but at this point, I'm so relieved to be finished that the grade is rather inconsequential! Next step, application process. I can already feel the acid reflux burning from the anxiety-caused churning of my tummy. You know what is funny, the fact that I am more scared about the application process than I am about having people's lives depend on me....I'm more frightened by their selection committee than being faced with a sucking chest wound....at least with the sucking chest wound I know what to do to fix it...with a selection committee, I have no idea....a basket of mini-muffins?

I started volunteering for a local hospice and was assigned to a lovely little spunky woman. I can't tell you much more than that, due to patient confidentiality, but she tells some of the greatest stories and I just spend 90 minutes a week laughing.

My room is an absolute disaster...it looks like a tornado followed by an earthquake and then a tsunami hit it. I had neglected it to do homework and now that homework is not an issue, I have to do something about it. My bathroom is starting to look like a bathroom you'd find at the Pi Kap House. I do not approve.

Gavin had his first soccer game tonight. It was raining, but the kids still played. Gavin didn't seem to mind, but my mom came home looking a bit like a drowned cat. She did not approve.

Ok. I'm going to go and watch Rick Mercer Report videos on YouTube....he's Canandiananandidianan and I don't understand all of the political jokes, but charming is charming and it transcends barriers!

Shirtless Jacob Black....check.

Well, dear friends, I have finished my drug dosage and calculations class. I took my final yesterday, and with the exception of the diluent questions....damn diluents are my Achilles heel....I did pretty well. I ended up getting a 94.5 out of 100 on the final and a 96% out of the class. I must say that it feels good to check another class off my list! Now I just need to survive the next 4 weeks, and I'll be finished with physiology, too. I just finished my physiology lecture of the male reproductive system....it was quite interesting and I learned quite a few things....zip it, Briskey....I know you're just dying to say something snarky, but keep your comments to yourself!!

I'm also unbelievably, nerdily excited for New Moon to come out tomorrow. I'm vacillating between being that nerdy grown-up who goes to Borders at midnight to buy it or just going to get it Saturday afternoon after I finish my homework. I suppose I'll just have to wait and see how I'm feeling tomorrow!

Annette, I put on Twilight....for some odd, unexplainable reason, it makes me extremely sleepy.

And Lillith, I'm glad that your Edison Baby is sleeping better, mine, on the other hand, cries every morning because he's so tired, regardless of how early I make him go to bed!

And Quentie, I heard Jumpin' Jumpin' the other day and I instantly thought of you!

Spring Ahead? Kiss my ass.

I agree with your comment completely, Kevin. I mean, what happens if the goatherder chooses the Americans and then in a few years the Americans pull out of Afghanistan and that goatherder is left knowing that it's only a matter of time before he's executed for treason. The author of the book actually makes some really interesting points about respecting the rules of engagement when you're fighting someone who has no desire to follow them...what do you do....how do you fight someone like that. It's an extremely interesting book, Kevin, you might want to look into reading it....he's got some elements of "Yay Jesus" and "Don't mess with Texas" and "I'm a Christian" that I found a little bit unnecessary, but I'm completely riveted by the fact that he never gave up...I can't vouch for the ending, as I'm not there yet, but if you're interested the book is called Lone Survivor by Marcus Luttrell if you get a free moment. How's Our Town going, by the way?

Today was a beautiful bright and sunshining day. I didn't have to wear my winter coat OR my scarf today and you know Spring is here because everybody has their scooters and motorbikes out. I love Spring in Logan!

I have my final for my drug dosage and calculations class on Wednesday. I know all the information is tucked away somewhere in my brain, I mean, I've learned it and been tested on it before, I'm just hoping my brain doesn't decide to do an information dump before then, otherwise, it could get very ugly! Sometimes I marvel at the fact that the thought of working in a busy hospital doesn't intimidate me, but taking tests makes me break out in hives!

Oh, and just for the record, I think Daylight Savings Time should die a slow and miserable death. That is all.

Beware the Ides of March

Almost my entire adult life I've hated the month of March. Upon reflecting on why I feel this way I realized that some of the worst things that have ever happened to me have happened in March. Granted, I've never been stabbed by a Roman senate, but if I could fast forward through the entire month and go from February to April I gladly would.

I'm reading a book about a Navy SEAL whose team was ambushed in the Hindu Kush mountains of Afghanistan and he was the lone survivor. I just finished the chapter detailing the killing of his best friends and fellow SEALS and that even with multiple bullet wounds, broken vertebrae and shrapnel embedded in his thigh, he's climbing up the side of a mountain to try to signal to American helicopters that he's alive. I can't even fathom the mental strength you would have to have to not give up and keep moving after seeing the side of your friend's head shot off. He talks about how difficult it is for soldiers with the Rules of Engagement set up by the Geneva Convention, because the goatherder that they let go might be the guy who tells the Taliban where they are. No wonder so many soldiers come back with so many mental issues. You can't have to deal with those kinds of life & death decisions without having some residual effects.

I've become addicted to chocolate covered marshmallow eggs. I can't help myself. They're just so good. Curse Easter and all its tasty non-denominational treats!