I can help you at this window, sir.

I often wonder what exactly goes through a person's mind when they're calling another human being "incompetent." And after they've yelled and belittled that person, do they have a flash of guilt or remorse about it. I'm wondering about it a lot more today as it actually happened to me this afternoon. I was helping a patron with his ticket order and evidently he felt my intelligence (or lack thereof) should be brought to the attention of my colleagues and his fellow patrons in a rather loud and abrasive manner. I've learned a lot at my job. I've learned a lot about myself at my job. I've mostly learned that people are kinda jerks. I hate to admit it. I hate it even more to put it into print, but, alas, it's the truth. I've learned that no good deed goes unpunished and if you give a mouse a cookie, he's going to definitely want a glass of milk and he's not going to want to pay full price for it OR like where I've put the cup. I guess this is what I get for being nice...but life kinda has a way of sucking the nice out of you....no, that's not true...life has a way of making you decide who you're going to be nice to and then leave the rest where they stand....I give everybody the same fair start...haven't they heard the saying "You get more flies with honey than you do with vinegar"?!!

Five days sooner...

So, I was watching America's Next Top Super Secret CIA Tippity-Top Top Model Search of America the other night and witnessed something that both disturbed and angered me. No, it wasn't Isis the transgendered contestant (who is FIERCE by the way), no, it wasn't the other contestants disgustingly mocking Isis (gross and not right), and no, it wasn't even Mr. Jay's hair (really, though, what was THAT?!).

It was a First Response pregnancy test commercial.

Evidently, previous pregnancy tests were too difficult. All the one pink line vs. two pink lines and pluses or minuses or Pregnant or Not Pregnant was too confusing...now they've engineered the test to simply read "No" or "Yes". To which I say: IF YOU CAN'T READ THE RESULTS OF A HOME PREGNANCY TEST MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE HAVING A KID!!! Seriously! Having found myself in the company of a home pregnancy test before, I can understand the stress-induced stupor that might make things a little dicey in the thought/recognition department, but c'mon you guys, it's not rocket science.

Scott & I commemorated one year of "dating" yesterday. It was all very exciting. I celebrated by being 3,000+ miles away from him, eating a bowl of spaghetti and then going to bed at 9:15. I know. Romantic, right?!!

The weather has finally taken a turn, and it's Fall in the great Cache Valley. I love the Fall. I love the Fall here. I'm ready for the mountainside to be varying shades of oranges and reds. I'm waiting patiently to be able to see my breath in the mornings....then I'll know that the cool weather is here to stay and I can break out the sweaters and the raspberry beret.

I just wanted to take a moment and tell Briskey how much I love him. You've always been a kind and devoted friend to me, Brian, even when I didn't deserve it. I can't and don't want to picture my life without your friendship. I never knew that I owed Rent so much...it saved you and brought you into my life. I love you. Now let's commemorate that love by living 3,000+ miles away from each other and eating a bowl of spaghetti!

If you're gonna run, you better keep on runnin'....

So Sprinkles ran away. Now. "Who is Sprinkles" you might ask...Sprinkles is my son's hamster. He informed me the other day that he would like to buy another hamster so that he may call it either Minkles, Tinkles or Rainbow. Just typing those names makes me smile. Anyway, back to the story at hand. We recently procured Monsieur Sprinkles a hamster "play-pen" that allows your hamster to be able to run around and feel the wind in his hair and the sun on his back and all that other jazz that is a simile for sweet freedom. Well, yesterday, while I was in the shower and my son was supposed to be watching Sprinkles, the aforementioned hamster pulled a great escape and climbed over the fence and ran directly into the laundry room and under the dryer, where he proceeded to spend the ENTIRE day! I have come to a realization. And the realization is this: That of the ways to spend a Saturday afternoon, sitting on the floor in a laundry room, trying to tempt a hamster out from under a modern washing appliance, does NOT make the top of the list. Eventually after several hours of avoiding capture, Sprinkles ventured out and was promptly cornered and caught. Sprinkles is now on probation and has lost his play-pen privileges...I think he's hoping one of his hamster friends will come and visit and slip him a hamster-sized cake with a tiny file in it.

Mom. I have school tomorrow. I need my rest.

Just a quick note to let you all know that Gavin survived and thrived during his first day at kindergarten. He thinks Mrs. Cook is very nice. She let him play with the airplanes and the snakes, but not the dinosaurs. There were no tears today, from either of us, and he's very excited to go back tomorrow, so I suppose it was a success all-around. The funny thing is that he had homework. That's right. He's five and he had homework! He now knows what sound a, b, c & e make. For all you theatre folks, all of Adrienne's classes are actually helpful in a non-theatrical capacity...who knew!

You know you love me. XOXO.

Well. I come to you, penetent and ashamed. I must take a deep sigh before confessing. *Inhales. Exhales.* I spent the weekend watching Gossip Girl with Hans...and I kinda loved it! I'm not one to be snobby about television, if it's horrible and reality based I will probably watch it. If it has anything to do with dancing, comediennes who say inappropriate things, or Tim Gunn using the phrase "Make it work" I will definitely be watching it. But when I first heard about Gossip Girl, I decided that I was going to refuse to watch it based solely on principle. That it was simply a trashy tv show about rich kids who made sexy time with each other while drunk on shaum-pahn-ya or high on the cocahina. But it recently has been the only bright spot in Hans' life, so I decided that I would watch it with her when she recently procured it from my local Sam's Club. And now, I want to be Blair Waldorf. I know it definitely falls under the "guilty pleasure" category of television viewing, but I'm a little too excited about the new season starting up in September....I want to know if Nate and Serena fell in love or into bed with each other and what happened with Dan and Vanessa and whether or not Chuck became admirable. However, I don't care what happens to Jenny....bitchy social climber....boo! For those of you who haven't watched it, I encourage you to turn off your brain for an hour (or 45ish minutes if you have the DVD or TiVo and don't have to wait for commercial....awesome), and just enjoy. It actually makes me really glad to live in a small town and shop at the Old Navy, because if that's really what high-society is like, I'd be eaten alive!!

Oh, on a side note: Gavin starts school tomorrow. 8am. I'm not quite sure how he's going to take it, as he's a bit of a night owl. It's entirely my fault....I guess that's what I get for doing all those shows while he was in-utero...I was kinda setting him up for it!

"Dew" you know what this means?!

As you may know from previous thrilling installments in my blog, I walk to work. It's the only time during the course of my day that I'm actually "alone" and I'm kinda snobby about it. Anyway, when I walked out of the house there was a slight nip in the air AND DEW ON THE GROUND!!! DEW ON THE GROUND, YOU GUYS!!! Do you know what this means?!! This is Logan-Speak for "Summer is almost over. Sweater Weather is on its way!" To which I say, "Huzzah"! I'm very ready for Summer to be over. I actually hate the heat. I think Summer loses all its appeal around the same time that you start dreading putting on a swimsuit.

Gavin has his teacher Meet & Greet tonight. I'm sure I'll be required to sit in a tiny Gavin-sized chair while Mrs. Cook elaborates on the finer points of kindergarten for my 5 year old son, who, if it doesn't have kung fu, dinosaurs or dinosaurs doing kung fu, he's not really interested.

So something a little weird....I've realized that every time I go to write a new blog, I have to use the ladies...EVERY time....the same thing happens whenever I talk to my sister, too...was that an overshare?

Last night I had a dream starring my dear friend Annette, Kathryn Moss and some random dude who in my dream we all knew and were friends with....we were in Italy and we were trying to get to Venice, but there was a rail strike and the only way to get there was to take one train at one very specific time, well we got to the train station to buy tickets and I realized I didn't have my purse, so Annette spotted me the money to buy the ticket, but I didn't like the idea of going to Venice without money of my own, so I ran back to the apartment to get my purse, but on my way back to the station I got lost and wandered around the city, but it didn't look like an actual Italian city, it looked like what an Italian city built out of foam core would look like. So I'm trying to find the train station and I realize that I've missed the train to Venice with the others, so I go to a restaurant and shrug my shoulders and eat some blueberry pamcakes. I do really like blueberry pamcakes and dislike Venice, so the ending actually makes total sense to me....the other stuff...not so much...

F-U-N...sound it out...

Good morning! It's Tuesday. There is little else I can say. Isn't there something mildly soul crushing about Tuesdays. And especially now that Dean & Tori is over, what do I have to look forward to...I ask you, what?! So my son went to his kindergarten evaluation yesterday. Essentially, it's 30 minutes of some gentle-voiced woman (a Mrs. Cook in our case) asking a whole bunch of questions to determine whether or not my son is a dummy. I am happy to report that he is NOT a dummy and we shall be finding out on Thursday who his kindergarten teacher is and if he'll be in the morning or afternoon session. All very exciting, I assure you. I still can't get over the fact that my son is 5! I remember being five....I remember being a witch for Halloween and the time the leprechauns came to class on St. Patrick's Day and left a trail of gold glitter...it seems strange that my son is now old enough to make and remember memories...very strange, indeed.