Your dad is gorgeous. Thanks, I know!

I'm convinced that as I get older, my dreams are getting weirder. I thought the weirdest one was the one where I was being chased by zombies through a high school library and the zombie turned out to be Tom Cruise, but last night's dream has topped it. I dreamt that I was married to my husband, Chris, but it wasn't Chris, it was Ewan McGregor, and we had gone on a holiday somewhere to this little bed and breakfast and while we were there we got all muddy and got mud all over the carpet and had to spend hours cleaning it up. Then in dream fashion, I wasn't muddy anymore and someone was knocking on the door to my room. So I go to answer the door and it's Tom Skerritt....for those of you who don't know who Tom Skerritt is, here is a reference pic....



Admit it, he is a little dreamy....anyway, so Tom Skerritt shows up because evidently Tom Skerritt and dream me used to be an item and he's come to interrupt my romantic mini-break holiday with my husband who is not Ewan McGregor but is Ewan McGregor to win back my affections. Dream me was pretty angry about the whole thing. The best part was when Tom Skerritt said to me, in an effort to make me love him again...."I heart (something I can't remember), but I heart heart you"! See what I mean, they just keep getting stranger and stranger!

I'm feeling a real lack of motivation to do anything today, which is a bad thing considering I have an NCLEX to study for and a storage room to clean out and bread and dishwashing detergent to go and buy. Please give me some motivation....anyone, anyone!

I took the kids to see Harry Potter on Sunday. I thought they ended it quite nicely. I was never a fan of the way J.K. Rowlings ended it in the book...that dumb flash forward scene with grown-up Ron and Hermione and Harry and Ginny, but even that didn't annoy me. I was a little underwhelmed by the fight seen between Mrs. Weasley and Bellatrix, I was hoping that it wouldn't follow the book and would be this epic girlfight, but alas, it wasn't and I was left wanting. Sigh. I would recommend going to see it, if you haven't already.

Briskey--I'm glad that you're back....I was starting to worry that something had happened to you, but you were just in the backwoods...phew! And YES you knew that Maryanne and Jeb got married....they've been married for like 4 years!!

If life were a multiple choice test, always pick C!

After some confusion concerning my transcripts and the fine people at DOPL, I am now scheduled to take my NCLEX...it's the test that allows me to become a licensed PN. It's all very involved. I have to go to a specific testing center. I have to have my authorization to test letter along with my ID or I will not be allowed to take the test. I am not allowed to wear jackets, watches, jewelry of any kind, chew gum, or use chapstick while in the testing room....I must admit I'm a little anxious about the no gum, no chapstick....I'm kind of addicted to both and the idea of going without them makes me a little uncomfortable! The test can take up to 5 hours to complete and it can take up to a week to get the results back. And if you don't pass it, you have to re-register and pay the $200 testing fee again (I thought $200 was a ridiculous amount of money, but then my dental hygienist was saying that she had to take one test that cost her $1500 to get her license and I didn't feel so bad about the $200!!). I did pretty well on the practice NCLEX we took in school, but it's been over a month since I've thought about nursey stuff and I feel very "rusty"! Thankfully I have a couple of weeks to study before the test, so hopefully that will help and I can get my brain back into patient care mode and I won't have a problem! I AM going to have to find a way to smuggle in my Wax Baby Jesus, who is my good luck charm...he's too pokey to put in my shoe or down my pants...besides, there does seem something slightly sacrilegious about sticking a small religious icon down your pants!

Once a week, the kid and I go over to my mom's for "Date Night." She DVRs all the terrible shows we like to watch (Bridezillas, anyone?!) and then we spend all evening watching shows and eating dinner and talking about nothing in particular (which, in my opinion, is sometimes the best conversation you can have!). In the doorframe to the laundry room, are measurements of how tall the kid is for the last few years. His favorite thing is to run over and see if he's grown any since the last time we measured him. Well, last night, it turns out he had....he'd grown an inch in a month!! I guess that explains why all his pants seem to be too short now! I DO NOT like that he's getting older. It makes me feel like we're fast approaching that expiration date where he starts to think I'm lame and doesn't want to hug me anymore. I understand now why some ladies continue having babies because they always want the snuggle-cuddle stage.

It is Christopher and my's 9-month anniversary today! That's crazy!

Christopher and I are proud members of the NetFlix family and just got Season 3 of True Blood in our queue....we've watched the first disc and It. Is. AWESOME! They've just introduced the werewolves into the storyline and I'm patiently waiting for Alcide to make his appearance.....mmmmmm.....Alcide!

Floodikins--Indeed we do need to talk and catch up!! I have no idea what's going on with you!! How are Summer and the babies?!

Kevin--I hope Denver is treating you well and you've had some success with the job hunt...

Good Morning Lisa--I was literally thinking about you the other day and wondering how you were!! I am not dead, thankfully, and I think of you every time I pass your parent's house in the canyon!

Ann-ette--I agree with you...sometimes I look at the kid and think that he's still the most spectacular thing to me...and that I made him and carried him and raised him and he's for the most part a normal and smart kid! It's all rather surreal, isn't it?!

Holiday. Celebrate. I live in my sister's basement.

It's the first day of July. Where did June go? I suppose summer loses some of it's magic when you become a grown-up and summer vacation ceases to exist, but I still marvel at how quickly time passes. It makes me feel old and I don't like feeling old.

I'm officially IV certified, so if anyone needs some maintenance fluid or IV piggy back antibiotics, don't hesitate to call. I successfully got both my sticks on the first try without any "fishing." I was very pleased....and so was Alivia....nobody wants to be a human pin cushion!

We have big plans for this holiday weekend! BBQs and trips to Bear Lake and water balloon fights. I will not be participating in the aforementioned water balloon fight, as I don't like wet underpants, but I'll fully endorse my children spraying their father with the hose!

Have a safe and fun Fourth of July Holiday everybody!! And just remember: "These Colors Don't Run"!!!

Just a little poke...

I'm doing IV therapy this week. After just four days I will be proficient in the art of starting IVs, calculating IV medications (which are, hands down, one of my most favorite things to do in the world....gtts/min and solving for x make me happy), and removing blood for testing. This is all very exciting. Except the fact that I've never actually put an IV in before, let alone gone anywhere near a human being with a needle. So before they let us "stick" our partner, we have to practice on mannequin arms (see above picture), complete with fake blood, that squirts back at you if you don't put the T-tube in fast enough! I performed my first successful angio-cath on a very accommodating mannequin arm today and am feeling a little more confident with my skills. My partner, Alivia, may not like me too much tomorrow, but I'm going to focus on not making her look like she's a IV drug abusing transient.

On a happier note, I haven't officially welcomed Baby Avery to the world yet.....so.....Welcome Baby Avery!! Yeah. That was anticlimactic. When you come to visit Auntie Amanda in a few years, I'll teach you some valuable lessons about not going to sleep with wet hair or wet fingernails and also how to avoid romantically pining after a gay man for 3 years....very valuable lessons indeed.

On a sadder note, I'm sorry about the job, Briskey. Keep your head up. Just keep swimming. Like a kitten in a tree, hang in there. You can always move back here and live in my basement. But you'll have to earn your keep by waking me up every morning by screaming "Fat ass, Fat ass" and then pantomiming Maggi smoking. The pay is excellent and I'll see if I can get you dental.

IIIIIIIIIIIII'mmmmmm Baaaaaaaack!

Hello, my dear friends, it has been ever so long since I've been here with you. I apologize for my long absence. I have been very busy these last few months, allow me to elaborate....

1. I applied for the LPN program
2. I met an unbelievably cool man
3. I got accepted into the LPN program
4. I married that unbelievably cool man
5. My entire life became homework, clinicals, tests, homework, studying, and more homework

But now, dear friends, I finished my last final (Care of the Family, if you'd like to know) this morning at 10:30am and, with the exception of a few odds and ends to finish up (exit interview, field trip to the burn unit at the U of U hospital), I am officially finished with my LPN program and will graduate next Thursday night. Do you know what this means?! No homework! AND I can share my insanely boring life with you all on a regular basis...aren't you excited? You should be!!

A few things:

1. Briskey--Ashley needs to stop kissing all of those men. As a healthcare provider, she's increasing her risk for contracting infectious mononucleosis or herpes simplex virus 1! A little self control never hurt anyone, Ms. Bachelorette, play a little hard to get, geez...

2. Ann-ette--I'm hoping that option 1 is the suggestion I made for you the other day....awww yeeeaaahhh....

3. Lil--Your baby makes my uterus hurt. His 'No Look' is so unbearably cute, it almost melts my icy cold heart...almost...

4. Kevin--I'm glad that you're moving onward and upward...I'm sorry you didn't get the position, but as cliched as it sounds, everything happens for a reason and something fantastic is coming your way, I can just tell. Also, can I come to the Mile High city to visit and buy you some chocolate munchkins from Dunkin' Donuts?!

Ok. Well. I'm going to go. My brain is a little fried post-finals and I'm in need of reruns on Bravo! Peace out!

This post is Amanda approved!

I'm writing to you from the warm comfort of my bed (God bless the laptop) whilst wearing the sock monkey pajamas Hans bought me for Christmas this year...they're full of win and exceptionally warm. Annette, it's not snowing here, but it's doing that poser raindrop kind of thing that it really wants to be snow, but can't quite get there. I do not approve. I'm ready for real Spring weather, although I'm convinced we're going to have one day of lovely Spring and then it'll be 900 degrees, because Mother Nature is a cruel bitch who likes to mess with me.

I'd like you all to know that I took my physiology final yesterday and am now finished with all my prerequisite classes. I won't know how I did on the final until next week, but at this point, I'm so relieved to be finished that the grade is rather inconsequential! Next step, application process. I can already feel the acid reflux burning from the anxiety-caused churning of my tummy. You know what is funny, the fact that I am more scared about the application process than I am about having people's lives depend on me....I'm more frightened by their selection committee than being faced with a sucking chest wound....at least with the sucking chest wound I know what to do to fix it...with a selection committee, I have no idea....a basket of mini-muffins?

I started volunteering for a local hospice and was assigned to a lovely little spunky woman. I can't tell you much more than that, due to patient confidentiality, but she tells some of the greatest stories and I just spend 90 minutes a week laughing.

My room is an absolute disaster...it looks like a tornado followed by an earthquake and then a tsunami hit it. I had neglected it to do homework and now that homework is not an issue, I have to do something about it. My bathroom is starting to look like a bathroom you'd find at the Pi Kap House. I do not approve.

Gavin had his first soccer game tonight. It was raining, but the kids still played. Gavin didn't seem to mind, but my mom came home looking a bit like a drowned cat. She did not approve.

Ok. I'm going to go and watch Rick Mercer Report videos on YouTube....he's Canandiananandidianan and I don't understand all of the political jokes, but charming is charming and it transcends barriers!

Shirtless Jacob Black....check.

Well, dear friends, I have finished my drug dosage and calculations class. I took my final yesterday, and with the exception of the diluent questions....damn diluents are my Achilles heel....I did pretty well. I ended up getting a 94.5 out of 100 on the final and a 96% out of the class. I must say that it feels good to check another class off my list! Now I just need to survive the next 4 weeks, and I'll be finished with physiology, too. I just finished my physiology lecture of the male reproductive system....it was quite interesting and I learned quite a few things....zip it, Briskey....I know you're just dying to say something snarky, but keep your comments to yourself!!

I'm also unbelievably, nerdily excited for New Moon to come out tomorrow. I'm vacillating between being that nerdy grown-up who goes to Borders at midnight to buy it or just going to get it Saturday afternoon after I finish my homework. I suppose I'll just have to wait and see how I'm feeling tomorrow!

Annette, I put on Twilight....for some odd, unexplainable reason, it makes me extremely sleepy.

And Lillith, I'm glad that your Edison Baby is sleeping better, mine, on the other hand, cries every morning because he's so tired, regardless of how early I make him go to bed!

And Quentie, I heard Jumpin' Jumpin' the other day and I instantly thought of you!