I'm doing IV therapy this week. After just four days I will be proficient in the art of starting IVs, calculating IV medications (which are, hands down, one of my most favorite things to do in the world....gtts/min and solving for x make me happy), and removing blood for testing. This is all very exciting. Except the fact that I've never actually put an IV in before, let alone gone anywhere near a human being with a needle. So before they let us "stick" our partner, we have to practice on mannequin arms (see above picture), complete with fake blood, that squirts back at you if you don't put the T-tube in fast enough! I performed my first successful angio-cath on a very accommodating mannequin arm today and am feeling a little more confident with my skills. My partner, Alivia, may not like me too much tomorrow, but I'm going to focus on not making her look like she's a IV drug abusing transient.
On a happier note, I haven't officially welcomed Baby Avery to the world yet.....so.....Welcome Baby Avery!! Yeah. That was anticlimactic. When you come to visit Auntie Amanda in a few years, I'll teach you some valuable lessons about not going to sleep with wet hair or wet fingernails and also how to avoid romantically pining after a gay man for 3 years....very valuable lessons indeed.
On a sadder note, I'm sorry about the job, Briskey. Keep your head up. Just keep swimming. Like a kitten in a tree, hang in there. You can always move back here and live in my basement. But you'll have to earn your keep by waking me up every morning by screaming "Fat ass, Fat ass" and then pantomiming Maggi smoking. The pay is excellent and I'll see if I can get you dental.
