First, let me begin by wishing my dearest friend Briskey a happy birthday! What's that you say, you say that it's not Brian's birthday, that Brian's birthday was actually on Sunday....the 20th...oh....ooops....my bad.....oh, well, better late than never: Happy Birthday, Briskey!!
Second, the reason I've been a little absent is that I recently started a new job. I'm working as a nurse full-time for a local physician and I start my working day at 8:30 and I don't stop until I leave at 5:30 and by the time I get home, I'm so tired, I can do little more than watch television and feed myself dinner without spilling on my shirt! I'm still learning all the quirks of the office and trying not to get overwhelmed by the new stuff I'm learning every day. I'm just trying to stay focused on the day, hopefully in the near future, that I won't have to ask where stuff is! And Ann-ette, you should know, that I'm doing all of this to one day be able to be the nurse for Mike at his practice, so you should probably warn his nurse that it's only a matter of time before she's replaced and then Mike will be surrounded by you at home and me at work and he'll LOVE it!!
Since writing to you last, Christopher and I celebrated our one-year anniversary. I still can't believe it's been a year...it's crazy! We went out to dinner, just the two of us, and it was lovely. Sometimes you get so caught up in the day to day grind that you forget about how much you love the person you're married to!
Today's installment of "Funny Things My Kid Says":
The other day Gavin was helping me with some household chores. I was telling him that I really enjoy sweeping because at the end of all the work you've got this pile of dirt and junk that shows the effort was worth it. I said that it made me feel like I had accomplished something. After we swept, he vacuumed the front room all by himself and when he was finished he turned to me and said, "You're right, mom. This is fun! And I feel really fulfilled!"
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Monday, October 10, 2011
Manly Men
An open letter:
Dear Cashier Lady at the grocery store,
The answer is yes. Yes, I'd like my groceries in a shopping bag. All my groceries. Yes. Even the frozen pizza.
Sincerely,
Amanda
The weather sure has turned frosty here. We had to turn on the furnace the other day. You always know when winter is approaching because the entire house smells like that burned socks haven't used the furnace in a while smell. I'm actually looking forward to it cooling down. That means it's sweater weather, my favorite, but I could do without the snow. Is there somebody who I could talk to about having no snow during the winter?
I've become addicted to the CSI reruns on SpikeTV. They start at 9am and go until 1pm. By the time they're finished, I've lost the entire morning, and I feel marginally guilty about it, but mostly I wonder what episodes are going to be on tomorrow!
Training for my new job went well. Everybody was extremely nice and patient with me. It's always a crap shoot whether or not you'll fit in, so it's nice when you do.
Ann-ette, I giggled non-stop for a solid minute about Grayzilla and his frogging in the computer room and then telling you about it! I giggled about it just now writing this!
Lillith--isn't it nice to know the incessant, stab-inducing songs of those alphabet videos actually work! It makes the potential nervous breakdown worth it!
I have a few additions to the blog installment of "Funny Stuff My Kid Says"
I was driving the kid to school the other morning, this was our conversation
Me: I'm hungry!
Him: Me, too!
Me: How can you be hungry, you just ate a bowl of cereal and a cup of hot chocolate/!
Him: Mom, just because I already ate breakfast, doesn't mean a man can't be hungry.
As I was leaving to go to Salt Lake, Gavin was hugging and kissing me and telling me "please don't go" and "I'll miss you". I gave him a hug and told him I'd be home soon and he wouldn't even notice I was gone. As soon as I stepped out the door, he turned to Chris and said, "It's Man House now!"
While I was away at training, Gavin and Christopher were attempting to finish the Raiders of the Lost Ark level on Legos Indiana Jones. As they were playing Gavin told Christopher to pause it, because he had to go to the bathroom. He ran to the stairs and before ascending them, turned to Christopher and said, "We need buckets. Pee buckets. Then we wouldn't have to stop playing to go to the bathroom, we could just use the pee buckets."
Dear Cashier Lady at the grocery store,
The answer is yes. Yes, I'd like my groceries in a shopping bag. All my groceries. Yes. Even the frozen pizza.
Sincerely,
Amanda
The weather sure has turned frosty here. We had to turn on the furnace the other day. You always know when winter is approaching because the entire house smells like that burned socks haven't used the furnace in a while smell. I'm actually looking forward to it cooling down. That means it's sweater weather, my favorite, but I could do without the snow. Is there somebody who I could talk to about having no snow during the winter?
I've become addicted to the CSI reruns on SpikeTV. They start at 9am and go until 1pm. By the time they're finished, I've lost the entire morning, and I feel marginally guilty about it, but mostly I wonder what episodes are going to be on tomorrow!
Training for my new job went well. Everybody was extremely nice and patient with me. It's always a crap shoot whether or not you'll fit in, so it's nice when you do.
Ann-ette, I giggled non-stop for a solid minute about Grayzilla and his frogging in the computer room and then telling you about it! I giggled about it just now writing this!
Lillith--isn't it nice to know the incessant, stab-inducing songs of those alphabet videos actually work! It makes the potential nervous breakdown worth it!
I have a few additions to the blog installment of "Funny Stuff My Kid Says"
I was driving the kid to school the other morning, this was our conversation
Me: I'm hungry!
Him: Me, too!
Me: How can you be hungry, you just ate a bowl of cereal and a cup of hot chocolate/!
Him: Mom, just because I already ate breakfast, doesn't mean a man can't be hungry.
As I was leaving to go to Salt Lake, Gavin was hugging and kissing me and telling me "please don't go" and "I'll miss you". I gave him a hug and told him I'd be home soon and he wouldn't even notice I was gone. As soon as I stepped out the door, he turned to Chris and said, "It's Man House now!"
While I was away at training, Gavin and Christopher were attempting to finish the Raiders of the Lost Ark level on Legos Indiana Jones. As they were playing Gavin told Christopher to pause it, because he had to go to the bathroom. He ran to the stairs and before ascending them, turned to Christopher and said, "We need buckets. Pee buckets. Then we wouldn't have to stop playing to go to the bathroom, we could just use the pee buckets."
Monday, October 3, 2011
I'd like one Satin Scorpion Jacket, please....
Hans and I went to go see the movie Drive yesterday, since she was up visiting for the weekend. I love Sunday matinees in Logan because nobody goes to movies....it was just Hans and I in the theatre (except for half way through when a weird dude came in and sat near the front of the theatre and then left before the credits....strange)....so we got to talk in outloud voices, which is something we're vigorously against at regular movies, but when it's just you and your sister, you can break the rules a little! Anyway, it was a very good movie. The pacing of the movie was very interesting in conjunction with the premise that the lead character is a get-away driver for criminals, so it would ebb and flow between being tense and fast and being slow and subdued. The second half of the movie was pretty bloody and violent...I could have done without seeing the fork stuck in a dude's eyeball....but I really enjoyed it and would recommend it. And my goodness is that Ryan Gosling dreamy.
I bought myself a little sewing machine this weekend, so I can sew Gavin's Halloween costume. It's nothing fancy, but it's a good little machine. Gavin has become obsessed with it. He's been asking to sew on it since I got it. So last night we sat down and I taught him how to sew. He just finished making me a belt with several pockets on it. It's slightly too big and the pockets have been sewn on upside down, but he was very proud of his first belt and I am currently wearing it!
I start training for a new LPN job at a home health company this week. It's in Salt Lake, so I'll have to drive down once a week and stay with Hans and my dad, but it'll be good to keep my skills fresh and to get a little experience.
I'm with Kevin, Ann-ette, it's important to get things in order. I have a will and Gavin will be going to my brother and his wife if anything should ever happen to me. I don't anticipate ever needing it, but it's good to have it. Also, I'd be happy to take on Grayzilla and Bebe Avery. Gavin is so grown up, he hardly needs me anymore and I've been missing having a little one around! Besides, who better to take care of your kids than someone in the medical profession?!!
Speaking of babies, I had another weird dream the other night that I artificially inseminated myself in the backseat of a limo and then started to freak out when I realized the sperm was from a black man and I didn't know how I was going to explain to my husband (who didn't look like my husband, but looked like the actor who plays Michael Westen on Burn Notice) why I had a black baby! I don't know where these dreams are coming from, but maybe I need to start listening to some Yanna before I go to bed...mellow this shit out a little bit!
In today's installment of "Funny Stuff My Kid Says"
The other day we were watching The Daily Show and they were discussing how poorly Rick Perry handled the Republican candidate debates. On one of the clips of the political shows, the commenter was equating Rick Perry's inability to form coherent arguments to having just "vomited on himself." John Stewart than took the joke a step farther and imitating the aforementioned commenter talked about diarrhea and poo and Rick Perry putting his hand in it. Well, Gavin and I having the mind of a 12 year old boy and finding bathroom humor funny, just laughed and laughed. Between giggles, Gavin said, "I don't know who this guy is, but he's hilarious!"
I bought myself a little sewing machine this weekend, so I can sew Gavin's Halloween costume. It's nothing fancy, but it's a good little machine. Gavin has become obsessed with it. He's been asking to sew on it since I got it. So last night we sat down and I taught him how to sew. He just finished making me a belt with several pockets on it. It's slightly too big and the pockets have been sewn on upside down, but he was very proud of his first belt and I am currently wearing it!
I start training for a new LPN job at a home health company this week. It's in Salt Lake, so I'll have to drive down once a week and stay with Hans and my dad, but it'll be good to keep my skills fresh and to get a little experience.
I'm with Kevin, Ann-ette, it's important to get things in order. I have a will and Gavin will be going to my brother and his wife if anything should ever happen to me. I don't anticipate ever needing it, but it's good to have it. Also, I'd be happy to take on Grayzilla and Bebe Avery. Gavin is so grown up, he hardly needs me anymore and I've been missing having a little one around! Besides, who better to take care of your kids than someone in the medical profession?!!
Speaking of babies, I had another weird dream the other night that I artificially inseminated myself in the backseat of a limo and then started to freak out when I realized the sperm was from a black man and I didn't know how I was going to explain to my husband (who didn't look like my husband, but looked like the actor who plays Michael Westen on Burn Notice) why I had a black baby! I don't know where these dreams are coming from, but maybe I need to start listening to some Yanna before I go to bed...mellow this shit out a little bit!
In today's installment of "Funny Stuff My Kid Says"
The other day we were watching The Daily Show and they were discussing how poorly Rick Perry handled the Republican candidate debates. On one of the clips of the political shows, the commenter was equating Rick Perry's inability to form coherent arguments to having just "vomited on himself." John Stewart than took the joke a step farther and imitating the aforementioned commenter talked about diarrhea and poo and Rick Perry putting his hand in it. Well, Gavin and I having the mind of a 12 year old boy and finding bathroom humor funny, just laughed and laughed. Between giggles, Gavin said, "I don't know who this guy is, but he's hilarious!"
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Buttons, Nuts, and Cupcakes
I'm currently writing this blog post on my iPhone. Why am I writing from my iPhone you may be asking yourself. Well allow me to explain. It is because my son currently has possession of my computer and is playing an online game entitled Defend Your Nuts. Yes. Defend Your Nuts. In which the player is a squirrel and must defend his nuts from various monsters that intend to steal his nuts. I told Christopher if he played his cards right, we'd play a little Defend Your Nuts later tonight! Was that an overshare?!!
In keeping with the overshares, Lillith, true story... I went braless once and the first words out of my mother's mouth was "your buttons are showing"!!
I'm happy to report I got my flu shot and didn't feel the teeniest bit ill afterwards....last year I got my shot and got pretty sick the next day. Maybe that's not the best way to encourage you, but everybody get a flu shot this season....you'll thank me later!!
I just finished making fun-da-middles cupcakes. If you haven't heard of them, find them at your local grocery store and make them, as they are awesome and ridiculously delicious!
The auto correct on my phone kept changed fun-da-middles to fun-da-Middlesborough. Not a very good name for cupcakes in my opinion.
And Ann-ette, two things. One. I was NEVER a crier, and as soon as I had Gavin, it's waterworks central. Ask Christopher about the time we watched the movie Taking Chance and they showed pictures of the real life Chance at the end of the movie and I cried for an HOUR....an HOUR!! And if I know a tv show that I usually watch is going to have an episode that deals with something awful happening to a child, I refuse to watch it. Two. I am very glad you gave up that ridiculous diet. Here. Have a fun-da-Middlesborough
In keeping with the overshares, Lillith, true story... I went braless once and the first words out of my mother's mouth was "your buttons are showing"!!
I'm happy to report I got my flu shot and didn't feel the teeniest bit ill afterwards....last year I got my shot and got pretty sick the next day. Maybe that's not the best way to encourage you, but everybody get a flu shot this season....you'll thank me later!!
I just finished making fun-da-middles cupcakes. If you haven't heard of them, find them at your local grocery store and make them, as they are awesome and ridiculously delicious!
The auto correct on my phone kept changed fun-da-middles to fun-da-Middlesborough. Not a very good name for cupcakes in my opinion.
And Ann-ette, two things. One. I was NEVER a crier, and as soon as I had Gavin, it's waterworks central. Ask Christopher about the time we watched the movie Taking Chance and they showed pictures of the real life Chance at the end of the movie and I cried for an HOUR....an HOUR!! And if I know a tv show that I usually watch is going to have an episode that deals with something awful happening to a child, I refuse to watch it. Two. I am very glad you gave up that ridiculous diet. Here. Have a fun-da-Middlesborough
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
A cream and two sugars
I'm writing to you all between bites of blueberry muffin. Don't get excited. It's a FiberOne blueberry muffin. This makes me officially old.
My husband's dog (I refuse to accept true ownership and refer to him as "our" dog) is in the front room eating toilet paper he got out of the bathroom garbage. And when I go anywhere near him, in a vain attempt to get the toilet paper, he picks it up in his teeth, growls at me and runs away. I'm convinced that he does this just to be an a-hole.
Since marrying Christopher, I have become a coffee drinker. Granted, I have to put so much milk and sugar in it to make it sweet enough, that it really should be called Sugar Milk with Coffee, but I was recently at the Starbucks and thought I'd try their new Pumpkin Spice Latte. Oh geez. It's good. TOO good. Now my day revolves around how I can manufacture errands that need to be run so I can, without guilt, go to the Starbucks and get one. This could potentially be a VERY bad thing for my wallet and my waistline.
I work my first flu shot clinic tomorrow. There's nothing really funny to say about that, just thought you guys might like to know.
Gavin's obsession with Star Wars continues. Last night he came upstairs, having made a throw blanket into a cloak and said "Look mom, I'm Lando Calrissian!"
Ann-ette, I was thinking that EXACT same thing with Dominique!! My first thought was how she lost the baby weight so fast and then quickly the second thought was "Who's taking care of your baby?!!" I don't know why you'd want to be away from your baby, but I suppose the paycheck for the series is pretty good, but let's be honest, we all know that Laura is going to win (as she was robbed and should have won her cycle), so missing that snuggle time with your baby wouldn't be worth it to me. And also, I think it's unnatural to lose all the baby weight that fast!!
P.S. I think you need to stop being so hard on yourself about the baby weight stuff. You're healthy and happy, with two beautiful babes and a husband who loves you and you'll lose the weight eventually, cut yourself some slack!
Ok, I better go. The dog is barking at a sprinkler. Sigh.
My husband's dog (I refuse to accept true ownership and refer to him as "our" dog) is in the front room eating toilet paper he got out of the bathroom garbage. And when I go anywhere near him, in a vain attempt to get the toilet paper, he picks it up in his teeth, growls at me and runs away. I'm convinced that he does this just to be an a-hole.
Since marrying Christopher, I have become a coffee drinker. Granted, I have to put so much milk and sugar in it to make it sweet enough, that it really should be called Sugar Milk with Coffee, but I was recently at the Starbucks and thought I'd try their new Pumpkin Spice Latte. Oh geez. It's good. TOO good. Now my day revolves around how I can manufacture errands that need to be run so I can, without guilt, go to the Starbucks and get one. This could potentially be a VERY bad thing for my wallet and my waistline.
I work my first flu shot clinic tomorrow. There's nothing really funny to say about that, just thought you guys might like to know.
Gavin's obsession with Star Wars continues. Last night he came upstairs, having made a throw blanket into a cloak and said "Look mom, I'm Lando Calrissian!"
Ann-ette, I was thinking that EXACT same thing with Dominique!! My first thought was how she lost the baby weight so fast and then quickly the second thought was "Who's taking care of your baby?!!" I don't know why you'd want to be away from your baby, but I suppose the paycheck for the series is pretty good, but let's be honest, we all know that Laura is going to win (as she was robbed and should have won her cycle), so missing that snuggle time with your baby wouldn't be worth it to me. And also, I think it's unnatural to lose all the baby weight that fast!!
P.S. I think you need to stop being so hard on yourself about the baby weight stuff. You're healthy and happy, with two beautiful babes and a husband who loves you and you'll lose the weight eventually, cut yourself some slack!
Ok, I better go. The dog is barking at a sprinkler. Sigh.
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Who cares! Just eat the cake already!
Gavin started at a new school this year and the curriculum is a little more involved than at his last school. I was helping him with his homework tonight and this was one of the actual questions we were faced with in the math section:
The clockmaker's wife was a mathematician. On his birthday she invited five other couples to tea. She made a birthday cake decorated to look like a clock face with numbers made from pink icing. She cut up the cake into twelve slices with a number on each slice.
The slices that she gave to each couple added to the same number. What was the number?
The clockmaker had the slice with 12 on it because it was his birthday. One guest wanted 7 because it was her lucky number. All the slices that went to men added to a number equal to those that went to the women. How could this be arranged?
O_O Blink Blink Head Scratch Huh?
Did I mention that Gavin is 8? EIGHT!!
It is a good thing that I married a man who is good at math, because that shit was even confusing to me!
Annette--I have seen pictures of Baby Avery and there is nothing that would make me think that she is a freakishly tall/big infant. Perhaps you need to put a Toony next to her in future photos so I can see the scale of things!!
Christopher and I are going on a date tomorrow night. I honestly can't remember the last time we went on a date! I think it was some time in February...maybe....It gets tricky trying to organize alone time with 3 babies, but we're going to do it. I might even shave my legs!
I'm reading a book entitled The Girls of Murder City. It's a non-fiction book about the women that inspired Chicago, but it explores more than just the women; it explores the entire culture of 1924 Chicago and the relationship between Prohibition, Gangsters, Women who murder, and the papers and reporters that cover the trials. It's really interesting and it's fun to see the way the fiction within a play weaves with the fact of real life. I highly recommend it!
In today's installment of "Funny Stuff My Kid Says":
Actual quote: "And if World War III starts, mom will send me to Canada, they are quite friendly there."
The clockmaker's wife was a mathematician. On his birthday she invited five other couples to tea. She made a birthday cake decorated to look like a clock face with numbers made from pink icing. She cut up the cake into twelve slices with a number on each slice.
The slices that she gave to each couple added to the same number. What was the number?
The clockmaker had the slice with 12 on it because it was his birthday. One guest wanted 7 because it was her lucky number. All the slices that went to men added to a number equal to those that went to the women. How could this be arranged?
O_O Blink Blink Head Scratch Huh?
Did I mention that Gavin is 8? EIGHT!!
It is a good thing that I married a man who is good at math, because that shit was even confusing to me!
Annette--I have seen pictures of Baby Avery and there is nothing that would make me think that she is a freakishly tall/big infant. Perhaps you need to put a Toony next to her in future photos so I can see the scale of things!!
Christopher and I are going on a date tomorrow night. I honestly can't remember the last time we went on a date! I think it was some time in February...maybe....It gets tricky trying to organize alone time with 3 babies, but we're going to do it. I might even shave my legs!
I'm reading a book entitled The Girls of Murder City. It's a non-fiction book about the women that inspired Chicago, but it explores more than just the women; it explores the entire culture of 1924 Chicago and the relationship between Prohibition, Gangsters, Women who murder, and the papers and reporters that cover the trials. It's really interesting and it's fun to see the way the fiction within a play weaves with the fact of real life. I highly recommend it!
In today's installment of "Funny Stuff My Kid Says":
Actual quote: "And if World War III starts, mom will send me to Canada, they are quite friendly there."
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Mixed Tapes, anyone?!
My car doesn't have a CD player, so I'm stuck with only being able to listen to cassettes or the radio...it's not as bad as it sounds. I recently cleaned out my car and found my grandmother's Shirley Bassey's Greatest Hits cassette tape that I inherited when she passed away (I also have a wide collection of Barbra Streisand, George Strait, and Louis Armstrong--what can I say, my grandma had eclectic tastes!). Anyway, I have decided that I love Ms. Shirley Bassey and want to be as sassy as she is when I grow up. Diamonds are Forever is hands-down one of the best sung songs in movie theme history....
Gavin has become mildly obsessed with Star Wars. I recently found him a book entitled The Strange Case of Origami Yoda about a social misfit who is exceptionally good at origami and creates an origami Yoda finger puppet that gives sage and wise advice to the children of the school. He's reading it to me before bed and I find myself chuckling quite a bit at the lovely writing style and the story. Chrizzie, I think Little Richie would find it hysterical. After reading tonight's chapter I have decided that the phrase "peed in my pants" will forever be funny....
America's Next Top CIA Secret Model Search of America Super All-Star Edition premiered tonight. You know I watched the shit out of that show! I realized tonight that I have seen every single cycle of ANTM. I'm not sure if this is a badge of honor or if I should be terribly embarrassed. Either way, I have decided that I don't like Nigel with hair. As I told Briskey, he looks like he's either going to try to sell me a used Cadillac or put a roofie in my drink!
I also watched the premiere of the new show Ringer with Sarah Michelle Gellar. I really, really liked it. It's nice to see SMG back on TV. My mom and I discussed that she looks older, but exactly the same! To be perfectly honest, I would watch the show even if it was terrible, but I'm glad it's not. Besides, that Ioan Gruffudd sure is dreamy.
In today's installment of "Funny Stuff My Kid Says":
I was talking with my mom today about how Christopher and I have been married almost a year. She jokingly said she was surprised that we'd lasted that long and I responded with "you thought I would have stabbed him by now?" She chuckled and Gavin, who was sitting on the floor playing Star Wars Legos, looked up and said "There have been a few close calls."!!
Gavin has become mildly obsessed with Star Wars. I recently found him a book entitled The Strange Case of Origami Yoda about a social misfit who is exceptionally good at origami and creates an origami Yoda finger puppet that gives sage and wise advice to the children of the school. He's reading it to me before bed and I find myself chuckling quite a bit at the lovely writing style and the story. Chrizzie, I think Little Richie would find it hysterical. After reading tonight's chapter I have decided that the phrase "peed in my pants" will forever be funny....
America's Next Top CIA Secret Model Search of America Super All-Star Edition premiered tonight. You know I watched the shit out of that show! I realized tonight that I have seen every single cycle of ANTM. I'm not sure if this is a badge of honor or if I should be terribly embarrassed. Either way, I have decided that I don't like Nigel with hair. As I told Briskey, he looks like he's either going to try to sell me a used Cadillac or put a roofie in my drink!
I also watched the premiere of the new show Ringer with Sarah Michelle Gellar. I really, really liked it. It's nice to see SMG back on TV. My mom and I discussed that she looks older, but exactly the same! To be perfectly honest, I would watch the show even if it was terrible, but I'm glad it's not. Besides, that Ioan Gruffudd sure is dreamy.
In today's installment of "Funny Stuff My Kid Says":
I was talking with my mom today about how Christopher and I have been married almost a year. She jokingly said she was surprised that we'd lasted that long and I responded with "you thought I would have stabbed him by now?" She chuckled and Gavin, who was sitting on the floor playing Star Wars Legos, looked up and said "There have been a few close calls."!!
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